air

Sitting in class I couldn’t breathe

I couldn’t breathe last night

when I was with you, but this is

different. The air is trapped

in my lungs and

I have no way to release it

I feel my leg shake and my foot tap the ground  

When did this start?

How long have I been tapping my foot?

Your face flashes in my mind again

and I wonder what you’re doing right now,

who you’re talking to,

do you want to talk to me?

The day has felt off.

The air is heavier.

The walk to class is longer.

The sun is harsher on my eyes.

The brick paths are harder on my feet.

My friends tell me to walk this feeling off,

shake off the anxiety

We walked this path last night

Somehow it was more beautiful then

Was it the company,

or the moonlight,

or the chill of the evening?

I will never know.

My stomach was full of butterflies

with you, but now it’s just a tangle of knots

I have no explanation.

I tell my friends that nothing bad happened,

but I can’t explain this feeling

I try to shake it away and

walk home. Maybe I’ll see you again

tonight.